Avid readers of this blog know that I suffered a knee injury at the Dothan Tournament while fighting Big Red. This got me thinking about some of the injuries I've received over the years (including non-karate related ones), and I've come to the realization that I'm a fast healer. I say that in the sense that I don't experience "major" pain for a long period of time. In other words, if it takes 4 weeks to recover from an injury, then I stop being affected in a significant way after 1 week. I'm not completely cured, but I don't suffer terribly for long periods of time. This might be a result of a higher pain tolerance, but I think that I actually heal more quickly from the onset. I'll use my last 3 injuries as an example.
Separated Ribs
After about 1 week I could move and breathe normally without any pain. The injury was tender to the touch, but only hurt if I tried to bend or stretch beyond a normal range of motion. Laughing only hurt if I really laughed hard.
The first 4 days was pretty rough. I couldn't sleep well and I couldn't move my right arm freely. On the 5th day, the constant pain ceased and I had 70% mobility in my arm.
Sprained Foot
I sprained my foot about 1 week after the full contact tournament. For about 2 days, I could only put 30% of my weight on my foot. On the third day I could move normally. It was about 3 more weeks before I could sit in seiza without significant pain.
Sprained Knee
It hurt like hell that evening and I could only put about 30% of my weight on my leg. That first night, I barely slept. After the 2nd day and night, I could put 50% of my weight on my leg. I still couldn't go up or down stairs without difficulty. On the 3rd day, I could put 70% of my weight on my leg and go up stairs with minor discomfort. I slept normally that night.
Right now, I'm at the point where I can put 100% of my weight on my leg, but I only have about 80% mobility. I can go up stairs with no pain, and I can go down stairs with slight discomfort if I do so quickly. I still can't bend my knee to go into iaidachi or seiza. I think it will be about 2 more weeks for iaidachi and about 4 more weeks for seiza. I'm hoping that I can recover sooner than that.
Don't want it 'til you can't have it
It's weird but I have a really strong urge to practice karate now. I guess it's because I get into class and I can't do it. Also, I'm beginning to realize how difficult it is to teach without being able to demonstrate. From a student perspective, a teacher unable to demonstrate has always been something that I've sort of ignored (if I liked/respected the teacher). Being on the other side of it, I find it absolutely maddening.
Take Master C for example. I can't tell you how many times he has taught me a karate lesson and has said, "Well, I can't do this right now," or "I wish I could show you". Most of the time, it was an issue with his knee. Most recently, he told me that he couldn't do a shotei (palm heel) because of arthritis. When he does a palm heel, it's like a palm down nukite.
Now, in my mind, I completely understand the concepts he is trying to convey; however, if he were talking to a newer student, they may not understand. The solution is to actually position the student's appropriate body part. Again, since I know Master C, I wouldn't have a problem with it, but what if I didn't know him? One of the things that infuriates me is when someone tries to tell me how to do something when they have know idea what they're talking about.
Don't get me wrong. I remain as humble as possible especially with something that is new to me, but if I have any experience at all then I'm going to be extremely intolerant of someone's BS. That being said, I generally avoid teaching things that I'm not very good at performing. For example, spinning back hook kicks. I suck at these. I understand the concept, the mechanics, and how it can be integrated into combinations, but I absolutely suck at performing them. I'll even go so far as to say that I'm somewhat reluctant to correct someone's technique on that particular move because I can't properly demonstrate how it should be done.
For those kinds of kicks I look to the PFCs and the Hangtimes of the world to instruct them. Now a spinning back kick? Yeah, I rock on those!
END OF LINE..."I'm the best at what I do. And what I do isn't very nice, bub."
A lot happened. Now that it is all over I have two things to say: 1) I am exhausted. 2) Mission Accomplished! Everyone had fun and everything worked out in the end [more details to come].
Friday, Nov. 6, 2009
10:00 - I picked up the rental van. Originally, BabySteps was going to follow me, but he wasn't feeling too good that morning. I think he is pregnant, but he won't admit it. Anyway, that process went pretty smoothly. I removed the back seat to make room for their luggage, but I wasn't sure if it was all going to fit. We were expecting 9 people and 11 bags. I ended up arriving at the airport at about 10:45. GM's plane was scheduled to arrive at 12:15.
12:30 - BabySteps arrives at airport. He was feeling better but still not 100%. His role was to help transport extra baggage.
13:00 - GM, Shihan Tsu, and 7 others arrive. We then go to baggage claim. One of the bags is missing. We talk to the skycap and he tells us that the bag is still in Dothan. BabySteps makes arrangements to have the bag delivered to HQ once the bag arrives from Dothan.
14:00 - We arrive at HQ. Because of his injured foot, GM decides to sleep in the living room. The young boys (6 total) sleep in the foyer. Meg sleeps upstairs in her own room as does Shihan Tsu. On a side note, I suggested letting GM's grandson have his own room, but Tsu denied the request because he felt that the young man might abuse himself. I assume he was joking. Later we go over the schedule. Saturday, GM wants me to take the kids to ride Go-Karts. Sunday is supposed to be a wash day. Monday is the clinic. He also wanted me to take the group to my college karate class. Tuesday, they go home.
Dinner was scheduled for 18:30 so GM put a moritorium on snacking and eating.
15:00 - I take Meg and Tsu to the grocery store to pick up supplies.
15:30 - I get a nerf football and play outside with the boys. They all seemed to have a good time.
17:30 - We start cooking dinner. We season and stack the steaks and get the baked potatoes started. The only problem was that we didn't have the oven high enough for the taters. Blarg!
19:00 - We start eating. Some of those kids sort of surprised me as to how much they can eat! The littlest one had an entire steak (approx. 12 oz) and entire potato plus salad. Oof.
Some of the highlights of the evening were when Sweet Tooth came over and wanted too much of the special steak sauce GM brought to give to the Admiral. The three adult Japanese tried Guinness 250. Only Meg liked it. She also liked the Lienenkugel Berry Weiss.
Saturday, Nov. 7, 2009
11:00 - Whirly Ball. The previous evening, I priced out a trip to Andretti's Speedway for go-karts. It was basically going to be a $30 charge for a 10 minute experience. I called Whirly Ball Atlanta and looked into pricing. It came out to be about $20 for an hour of fun. Mr. Ba joined us as a translator of the rules and rounded out team to 5 people per side. Everyone had a fun time. I'll have to say that our referee (Emily) was pretty cute.
If you've never played Whirly Ball, here's how it works. You have 5 people on each team. The games are 13 minutes long. Each person is seated in a bumper car and is issued a plastic scooper. The object of the game is to go to your team's goal (indicated by color) and hit a sensor with the ball. Once that happens, your team scores a goal and the other team gets the ball. I was on the Red Team.
In the first two games, the Yellow team defeated the Red. I don't really know how because no goals were scored. In the last two games, the Red defeated the Yellow. BabySteps told me later that the extra non-goal oriented points were from penalties. Mainly, hitting the other team's scoop. Whoops!
12:30 - I took the crew to Mother Fuddruckers. They requested "Giant Hamburgers" so I figured this would be alright. The majority of them got the 1/3 lb. burger which I found unusual since they wanted "giant" burgers. Everything was tasty and delicious (as it should have been).
13:30 - We made a trip to North Point mall. While at the mall I got a call from BabySteps stating that GM was very concerned with the missing bag. I called Master C and asked if someone could go to the Dothan airport to see if the bag was still there. Mrs. C went to go check, but it wasn't there.
16:00 - We made it back to HQ. GM was a little upset because he thought we were coming back at 15:00. Once there, Mr. Ba translated all that had transpired with the bag. BabySteps was then assigned the task of recreating the certificates that had been lost. I took a list of all the missing items.
18:00 - Dinner consisted of rice, chicken, and green beans. Pretty tasty.
Sunday, Nov. 8, 2009
10:00 - We set out for Stone Mountain. While we were there, we took pictures of the mountain and then went to the gift shop. We didn't go to the top like we usually do. The only thing of note that happened was that the Admiral and Meg got hit on by a bunch of European tourists.
12:00 - We made it to the World of Coke. I parked in a garage that only gave me about 3" clearance. I kept ducking my head as we went through the garage. Once at the Coke Museum, we settled in and took the tour. It was the same as the last time. Secret Formula = 4 U's. Unforgettable taste; Uniform Quality; Universal Availability; and [whispering] YOU! Lame.
I need to make mention that there was one little kid in our group who was sort of giving me grief the whole time. He's a cute kid, funny, and has a real upbeat personality, but he sort of has a smart mouth and a penchant for mischief. Everyone in the the group labelled him as being "perverted". He kept denying it, but everytime he did he would sort of smile and wink at me. Weird.
Anyway, when we got outside the World of Coke and everyone wanted a picture so I asked an attactive lady to take our photo. Once she walked away, the kid started pointing at me and saying I was also a "pervert". I laughed and half-heartedly chased after him. After that point, anytime I looked at a good looking female, he would point at me and say "pervert".
14:00 - The group was sort of hungry so we stopped at the Varsity for lunch. I think they enjoyed themselves.
15:00 - We ended up back at the mall. On the way there, I noticed a few of the kids didn't have their seatbelts on. To make matters worse, they were sort of screwing around. I told them to put on their seatbelts and then Shihan Tsu went ballistic on them. Once we got to the mall, the Admiral got to see the rigors of Japanese discipline.
Tsu lined all the kids up and slapped them across the face. The ones who had their seatbelts on he didn't slap as hard, but the ones who had been screwing around got big pimp sized slaps. Listening to Tsu, I picked up that he slapped all the kids because the ones who knew about the seatbeltless ones should have said something. Also, none of them wanted GM to find out so slapping everybody made sure that no one would tease each other about it and get into more trouble.
At first I didn't know what was going on. I got out of the van and headed toward the mall and I heard some Japanese yelling and heard "SKLAPP!!" After one or two more seconds, "SKLAPP!" I turned around and saw a look of stunned surprise on the Admiral's face. It was priceless really.
17:30 - After a short trip to Target (in which GM's grandson gave me grief - he said, "Oh target. Just like Picklez Sensei. He targets women!"), we went over to the Golden Corale. It was as good as to be expected. BabySteps and Hangtime met us there as well.
Monday, Nov. 9, 2009
We all pretty much took it easy during the day. After breakfast, I made a round of calls for GM. I checked on the status of the lost bag, arranged for them to sit together on the flight over to Japan, and arranged for GM to have a wheelchair in the Atlanta airport and in the Narita airport. Not too shabby for a morning's work.
14:00 - We loaded up in the van and headed to the college for my karate class there. I made a short stop at my house to change clothes. I didn't invite them inside because it is a huge mess.
16:00 - I introduced them to the President, my director, and my manager. We then taught the class. Before class started, the lil' pervert was going around toe kicking people in the anus. He would then make great efforts to run away from the victim. Unfortunately, his attention span wasn't so good so the victims would eventually sneak up behind him and slap him upside the head and say, "We're even!"
The class itself went pretty well. Meg and Tsu were asking me if there were any blonde haired girls in the class. I answered in the affirmative and they told me that GM's grandson only wanted to work with blonde haired girls. I laughed. During the class, I had all the guests try and coach the Americans. The lil' pervert took a shining to one of the red haired girls in the class. Later, I asked him if he had made a new girlfriend. He said, "No!" But then he glanced around to make sure no one was looking and made a crude gesture. I pointed at him and called him a pervert and he laughed and ran away.
18:15 - We lined up for the clinic. The original plan was to start around 18:45 and then have GM arrive at 19:30, watch a little bit, sign things, and then be off on our merry way. GM changed the plans and arrived at 19:00 or so. He watched for a while and then started signing at 19:30.
I was pretty pleased with the clinic overall. GM complimented the class' basics. Once he got settled in he told me to sit down next to him and watch the class. I would sort of shout out corrections, but he said, "You teach all time. Japanese people coach. People big happy!" I think that was his way of telling me to sit down and shut up! Hahaha!
I don't think he was too impressed with the black belts though. I'm sure this will all come back to me as "I don't do enough of their training in class", but my answer to them is that I've NEVER done much black belt training in class. That's what road trips and camps are for. If they were smart, they would offer me a nice fee to do a black belt only clinic. I'm pretty sure that the reason they don't do that is because they feel they're "owed" free instruction because they work for me (sporadically at best) during the week. I think I need to explain to them that assisting with class is their duty as black belts and there is no compensation for it.
Anyway, Meg did Bassai sai and she was unbelievable. To say she was "good" would be a huge understatement. Also, anyone who saw her perform and thought, "I'm nearly that good" is an egotistical jack ass. She has the perfect blend of natural ability, genetics (grandfather is an 8th deg, father is a 5th deg), and a hell of alot of practice.
21:00 - GM wanted to eat at a Chinese Buffet for dinner. Unfortunately, we only had 2 choices. A nearby place that sucked or a pretty good place that was over 10 minutes away. We went for the latter. Dinner went pretty smoothly. My knee was killing me though. I got out of the van kind of funny right before the clinic and it started hurting in the middle of it.
The other off putting thing was there were two overweight yet roided up rednecks wearing MMA stuff talking loudly about their fighting ability in a table near us. I decided not to deal with them. Sweet Tooth had a conversation with them, but I don't know what it was about. They looked like a couple of cockasses to me, plain and simple.
Tuesday, Nov. 10, 2009
08:00 - We left for the Atlanta airport. The weather was less than accomodating. There was a heavy rain. Traffic was pretty bad too. Before we left, we checked and the flight was delayed by 45 minutes.
09:15 - We made it to the airport. As we checked into the flight, we put each bag on the scale and everyone "oohed" and "ahhed" as the total came up. The lady checking us in was pretty amused by that. We had all the claim paper work filled out for the little boy that lost his bag and BabySteps decided to check one more time. They found the bag so I helped the boy get it checked onto the plane.
10:00 - GM was able to link up with Rita and her mom. They then went off to the security area. BabySteps and I beat feet to the parking garage so that I could return the rental van.
11:30 - As a treat we went to lunch at CIP. I only did it as a "thank you" to BabySteps for all his hard work over the weekend.
13:00 - We got back to the house and I promptly fell asleep while he worked. I woke up at about 17:00 and prepared to go to class.
Final reflections
Now that it's all over and I've had a day or two to decompress, I'll have to admit that it was a pretty fun and exciting visit. The rental van was pretty easy to drive. It was much easier than the mini bus a few years ago. It had a really "marshmallowy" response time, but I got used to it. When I finally got back to driving my car, I realized how responsive my little Fit actually is.
On the morning before they left, I was eating breakfast with him and he looked at me and said, "Soon you maybe shihan, yes?" I just looked up from my bowl of noodles and shrugged my shoulders and said, "I don't know, sensei. Maybe."
Kaicho usually gives little gifts to me, BabySteps, and the Admiral. This year he gave me a carton of Plum Wine and some cloth (which was supposed to be for the Boss). When he found out that we were in the process of getting a divorce he told me to keep the wine but to still give her the cloth. He gave the Admiral a carton of Plum wine too and a bottle of Japanese steak sauce (tasty!) and he gave BabySteps a Y* shirt. Apparently, only black belts can wear that shirt. It is purple, long sleeved, and has the Y* kanji on the back left shoulder (sort of the opposite of the blue shirts). Also, if I understood him correctly, he will be sending me and the Admiral shirts as well.
In addition to the shirts, he mentioned sending us the same warm-up jackets that the Japan people wear when they come to the US. That would be pretty cool. They are heavier than my pull over W Org windbreaker but lighter than my TA coat. Nice.
END OF LINE
Current Standings
Picklez 88 (tied for 2nd place, 6 points behind the leader)
BabySteps 81 (8th place)
LG 85 (6th place)
Hangtime 76 (dead last)
Tiny Tanks 88 (tied for 2nd place)
LG continues to chip away at my lead. I've caught up with Tiny Tanks. BabySteps remains 7 points behind me and Hangtime is bringing up the rear. All because he forgot one week. Honestly, though even if he had picked that week I might be tied with him right now, too.
Week Ten Picks
Hoping to get a perfect "10" and wipe out all the competition and hold 2nd place all my own. Still in the lead for the Vox group though. A rare week as I went with ALL favorites.
CHI @ SF - Neither team has played well lately. Gotta go with homefield advantage. I still feel that SF can have a winning season this year. Picklez Pick: SF
BUF @ TEN - TEN is no longer winless. They aren't the powerhouse they were last season, but they should still be able to beat BUF. Picklez Pick: TEN
NO @ STL - I contemplated on making this an upset pick. STL in the past has been a "Giant Killer". The Saints are just too awesome. Picklez Pick: NO
TB @ MIA - The Suckaneers won the "Battle of the Bays", but they are no match for the Fins. As a side note, I would like to see MIA go winless at Pheaderation Stadium; however... Picklez Pick: MIA
DET @ MIN - A no brainer. Picklez Pick: MIN
JAC @ NYJ - The Jets. They suck so much. JAC. They suck so much. Homefield advantage. Picklez Pick: NYJ
CIN @ PIT - There's no way PIT is going to let CIN come into their house, kick their dog, screw their wife, and win a football game. I hope. Picklez Pick: PIT DEN @ WAS - Let's get this straight. I hate DEN. That being said, WAS is not performing well. Picklez Pick: DEN
ATL @ CAR - ATL is solid (if not a little inconsistent). CAR just plain sucks donkey ballz. Picklez Pick: ATL
KC @ OAK - A bitter rivalry for the attention of Sterquilius. Picklez Pick: OAK
DAL @ GB - If you lose to Tampa Gay, you don't have much of a chance against a decent team. Picklez Pick: DAL
SEA @ ARI - Does Seattle still have a team? Oh, yeah. They are the Suckhawks. Picklez Pick: ARI
PHI @ SD - SD keeps continuing to surprise me. I still don't think they are any good though. The heat of 1000 suns won't allow me to pick an upset. Picklez Pick: SD
NE @ IND - This could be the upset game, but I'm still going with IND. The power of Manning! is not to be denied! Picklez Pick: IND
BAL @ CLE - I wish I could pick the Browns. I really do. The unfortunate thing is that if I do, I will lose a point. Picklez Pick: BAL
JUST FOR THE RECORD, I DON'T LIKE ERIC "MANGINA" AND I HOPE HE GETS THE BOOT AFTER THIS SEASON.
Had to post this:
The movie would have been so much awesomer if this was the Wizard.
THAT IS ALL
Current Standings
Picklez 79 (4th place, 4 points behind the leader)
BabySteps 72 (8th place)
LG 76 (6th place)
Hangtime 69 (dead last)
Tiny Tanks 80 (3rd place)
LG continues to gain, Tiny Tanks has a horrible week, BabySteps continues to flounder, Hangtime is still struggling from his week of missed picks.
Week Nine Picks
I'm still shooting for the "perfect" week, but I don't see how I can get it with all these damn upsets.
WAS @ ATL - No brainer pick...or is it. ATL at home, but there's still BabySteps' Monday night loss theory to consider. WAS has no QB and no head coach. Hmmm.... Picklez Pick: ATL
ARI @ CHI - I don't know what happened to ARI last week. Losing to CAR at home?! I think they'll tighten up and if we see the same ARI team that played against the NYG, then CHI doesn't stand a chance. Then again, maybe not. ARI has been woefully inconsistent and the CHI defense is sort of merciless. Picklez Pick: CHI
BAL @ CIN - This was hard to pick. I hate both teams equally. Ouchostinko can suck it. Twitter on that, Chad! Picklez Pick: BAL
HOU @ IND - To be honest, IND didn't play well last week. If the Screwston effect is in, then this could be the end of the regular season winning streak for IND. I don't think it will be though. The power of Manning! is undeniable this year. Picklez Pick: IND
MIA @ NE - MIA beat the Jets. No biggie. There's no way they're going to be able to roll into Foxboro and beat the Patriots at home. Also, I'm making this announcement since the NYJ have the bye this week. NYJ sucks. I'm always hopeful for them at the beginning of the year and then I am sadly disappointed. As hot as the Flight Crew is, these guys can't seem to put together a winning season. Sad really. Picklez Pick: NE
GB @ TB - Losing to Favre and the Vikings at home was tough, but GB is a much better team than the Suckaneers. Picklez Pick: GB
JAC @ KC - Both teams suck. Who sucks more? Picklez Pick: JAC CAR @ NO - NO is unstoppable right now and they are extremely fun to watch. Going with the Saints. Picklez Pick: NO
DET @ SEA - DET let me down by losing to Suck Louis. They won't do well against the Suckhawks. Picklez Pick: SEA
SD @ NYG - Will PeyPey release some of the power of Manning! to Eli for their home game this week against SD? I hope so. They need to break the shame spiral they're on right now. Not just for themselves, but for me. Picklez Pick: NYG
TEN @ SF - Vince Young led TEN to a victory against crappy JAC. Can he turn the whole season around? No. Picklez Pick: SF
DAL @ PHI - I don't want to say outright that PHI is good because I hate them and their pro-dog murdering ways, but I have to admit that they've been playing well lately. That ends with this upset pick of the week. Picklez Pick: DAL
DEN @ PIT - The facade of the DEN horses cracked last week and will continue to split. Picklez Pick: PIT
OH WHEN THE SAINTS, GO MARCHING IN, OH WHEN THE SAINTS GO MARCHING IN...
It was a tournament weekend. It was filled with thrills and spills. Here's the skinny.
Thursday 10-29-09
I got to Dothan at about 13:00 local time. I checked into the hotel and rested for a little while. By rested, I mean that I called one of my credit card companies to get something sorted out and was treated extremely rudely by the service rep. He said his computer was down and he wanted me to call back in 5 minutes. I didn't want to go through automated hoops again and have to re-enter all my data to get to another service rep so I asked him to transfer my call to another rep. He basically insulted my intelligence and told me that I might want to take a class on computers and on how they work. I told him I wanted to talk to a supervisor so the guy put me on hold and then hung up on me. I finally got everything sorted out, but I was turbo pissed.
Shortly after I got off the phone, Master C called me. I went over to his house at 14:15 and we went to teach one of his classes. This class was taught as an afterschool course at his daughter's school. The kids were just out of school so they were sort of rambunctious. Also, they're not used to visitors so they were sort of taken aback by seeing another black belt. I warmed up the class and then they did their tournament stuff.
After participating in that class, I realize now more than ever why Master C is a true karate master. He has an incredible amount of patience. He also has an aura about him (especially around children) that demands respect without being overly intimidating. This is something that I need to cultivate in myself. It's little things like calling all the girls "sweetheart" and all the boys "son".
After class, we went back to the homestead and took a short rest before going to pick GM up at the airport. It turned out that GM's flight got in a little early and we were a little behind schedule because we forgot to wait for Master T before heading to the airport so we had to wait on him a little while.
We loaded up all the luggage and people and made our way back to the homestead. After all the packing and unpacking, we had a light dinner of soup and sandwiches. Some Dothan black belts came by as well as a group of Canadians who are looking to join our organization. I didn't really interact with them much but from what I saw, they seem like a really good group.
It turned out to be a pretty late night. I was asked to call at 08:00 the next morning. I fell asleep very quickly once I got back to my hotel room.
Friday
I woke up at 07:45. Promptly showered and dressed and then called Master C at 08:00. He told me to come by the house at 08:30. When I got there we loaded up into Master C's truck and went to get breakfast. I had an omelete, some sausage, and a pancake. After that we had to get some parts to fix the kitchen sink which had exploded the previous night.
We headed back to the house for a short rest before going over to the dojo to load up the mats for the demo and bring the trailer over to the civic center. We got to the civic center at 13:00. The trophies had already been unloaded so the trailer unloading process went by pretty quickly.
I was placed in charge of lining off the rings. I hate this process when it is done on a wooden gym floor. With the tile, it's easy to mark off and line things up. With a wooden floor you have to measure very precisely. It took a while but we got all the outer rings marked off and we were able to mark the center lines. We left the gym at about 15:45.
We had a "snack" of Krystals, left over soup, and Wendy's chili. Master C ate and then retired for a nap. At 17:15 we got into the van and headed for the demo practice. Before the practice officially started, they did the rank promotions. A bunch of people got their 1st deg and Overboard got her 3rd deg. Shihan Bl from LA got his 7th; Mr. El got his 6th; Mrs. McI got her 6th; Mr. Taylor got his 6th; and Mrs. Taylor got her 5th.
Overall, the practice went pretty well. I was able to weasel out of having to do the kata. I also got assigned to the announcing during the day. We didn't get out of the practice until about 20:00 and I had to stay a little later to get all the center lines down. One funny thing that happened during the practice was that someone was squeaking a chair in the upper deck. I looked at PFC and he grimaced as he was reminded of the "Squeaky Shoe" debacle.
I went back over to the C homestead when I finished and we then went out for mexican food at La Parrilla. It was pretty tasty. I had to work on a list of Shihan's for introduction the next day. I had to be really careful about the order and whatnot so as not to offend anyone.
After dinner I went back to the hotel and visited with the Medic and PFC. The Medic opened the door of his hotel room and I was greeted by the sight of his huge white ass. We chatted for a while and then PFC fell asleep. We decided to put a picture on his phone, but neither of us was too keen on actually photographing our balls because PFC would kick our asses later. We took a few very convincing photos of his elbow, though.
Saturday Demo
I got to the civic center at about 08:30. There were a lot of last minute details to go over such as the final schedule. As expected a few people who weren't at the practice showed up and wanted to participate. Instead of telling the people they couldn't participate, we let them go ahead and try. One young girl in particular didn't even know the kata, but she did the demo anyway.
The demo consisted of the group bo kata; Self-Defense; Fighting; Sword; and Breaking.
Operation
Remember that game Operation? Well, I got Water on the Knee and the rubber band connecting my knee to my ankle has come loose. I was kicking with my right leg and Big Red kicked my supporting leg out from under me. Somehow in the process, I twisted my knee. It hurt bad. Real bad. It still hurts and will continue to hurt for the next few weeks, I assume.
Big Red is officially a bad ass in my book, now. This is about the 20th time he's whipped my ass. I'm counting kata, weapons, and overall usefulness. I don't know when or how he got so good, but he did. I respect that.
Breaking
As I stood there waiting for the sword demo to finish, I contemplated not attempting to break my bat. I decided to go through with it anyway. I did it. Big Red didn't break his bat, but apparently he separated PFC's shoulder in the attempt. The Medic bent his aluminum bat with relative ease.
Saturday Tournament
I didn't get to compete because of my knee injury. I'm not entirely sure I would have wanted to compete anyway. I would have to compete against two of my students plus about 4 of my friends. In the kata divisions, I was very happy to see Mr. N. McG compete again. He competed with us at the Panama City tournament and all I can tell you is that I need to find out what that boy is eating for breakfast. He went from sloppy to bad ass in a very short amount of time. Right now, I would place his kata in the top 5 of the entire style.
I watched a little bit of sparring. The Admiral fought really well despite the fact that she lost her first fight. I'll have to admit though that the judging was a little suspect. The Admiral scored about 5 points before they finally stopped the fight to award her opponent a point.
Hangtime fought well too. His first fight the guy who beat him got lucky. The second guy was the idiotic gorilla from PC. That gorilla guy is a complete dick. He's like a fat, flying freight train. Watching him point fight is like watching someone projectile vomit on someone else. What's coming isn't very pretty but it's pretty much unavoidable. If I had to fight that guy, my strategy would be to wait until he rushed in with his no control ridgehand and just side or front kick him in the nuts.
Saturday Party
All in all, it was pretty uneventful. Hangtime, Overboard, BabySteps, the Admiral, Sweet Tooth, Big Red, and I went to eat Thai food after the tournament. We met in my room and BabySteps got a funny on me. He said that I was "nuts over" a girl and then said that she was only 3' tall. Sweet Tooth was pretty amused by that.
After dinner was over, I had trouble getting out of my chair because of my knee injury. BabySteps suggested that I ride on his shoulders and we could be "Master/Blaster". I thought Sweet Tooth was going to pee himself he was laughing so hard.
The DJ event went pretty smoothly. My one regret was that I couldn't dance (because of my knee). One my younger students (I think she's 6) kept requesting songs. The funniest one was "Galvanize". It got to this one part and she danced like a robot and mouthed the words "Push the button". It was so cute.
Aftermath
This knee injury is by far the worst injury I've suffered in the past 5 years. The bruised femur bone was bad, but this is almost unbearable. I feel like it is improving though. The paramedics looked at it on Saturday and said that as long as it didn't turn colors in the next 24 hours, I probably didn't need to get it x-rayed. It didn't turn colors, so I'm pretty confident that it's just twisted or sprained and should heal up to at least 70% by the end of this week.
What I consider to be 70% is not feeling pain getting in and out of the car, walking up and down stairs, and being able to sleep and change positions without waking up. I understand that I won't be running or sparring for at least 3 weeks. I just want to be able to perform normal functions like sitting down on the toilet to take a crap without pain or the fear of emminent pain.
I need to be mobile by the end of next week because GM and the Japanese are coming into town. It's going to suck having to drive them around and take them places and not being able to walk correctly is certainly going to make things much more difficult than they should be.
END OF LINE
Current Standings
Picklez 70 (Tied for 4th place, 4 points behind the leader)
BabySteps 62 (8th place)
LG 68 (6th place)
Hangtime 60 (dead last)
Tiny Tanks 73 (2nd place)
LG is nipping at my heels, but Tiny Tanks has a nearly insurmountable lead.
Week Eight Picks
Here it is midseason, and I'm still getting surprised! Not good. My prediction is a NO vs IND SuperBowl.
HOU @ BUF - The real question is: Can BUF win 3 times in a row? I don't think so. HOU is a much better team than CAR. Of course, NYJ should have beat BUF. Will the LG "Screwston" theory hold true? Picklez Pick: HOU
CLE @ CHI - As much as I hate to say it, CLE is awful. CHI isn't the pick of the litter either, but I think that they have enough juice to beat CLE at home. Picklez Pick: CHI
SEA @ DAL - I'll have to hand it to Tony Homo. He was firing on all cylinders against ATL last week. The Suckhawks aren't 4/13ths as good as ATL. Picklez Pick: DAL
STL @ DET - Another game honoring Stirquilius, Roman god of Feces. This is STL last chance to avoid the dreaded 0-16. Desperation is in the air, but DET wants to double their wins this week at home. Picklez Pick: DET
SF @ IND - SF has played horribly the last two games. Are they merely giant killers? I'll just say this. The way PeyPey is over performing and Eli is underperforming, I may have to bring back my theory of the Power of Manning! I don't think SF has what it takes to beat IND at home. Picklez Pick: SF
MIA @ NYJ - This seems like a pretty easy pick, but it isn't. The Jets haven't been performing well as of late. MIA had a heck of a game against NO, but they still came up short. I'm going with NYJ. By the way, Flight Crew > Dolphins Cheerleaders. Just sayin'. Picklez Pick: NYJ
NYG @ PHI - Upset #1. I know that PHI won against WAS on Monday night, but WAS sucks. The Giants lost to the best team in the NFC two weeks ago and the NFC champion last week. A road win is just what they need to boost their morale. Picklez Pick: NYG
DEN @ BAL - DEN sucks. BAL is solid. What I'm afraid of is a massive conspiracy to convince everyone that DEN is good. Picklez Pick: BAL
JAC @ TEN - TEN needs to win this game. I really don't understand what's wrong with them. This is really a 50/50 chance either way. Picklez Pick: TEN
OAK @ SD - OAK can surprise you every once in a while. Same with SD and I don't mean this in a good way. SD should handily defeat the Gayders. Picklez Pick: SD
MIN @ GB - This is the game to watch this week. There will be copious amounts of hate. MIN is better though. Picklez Pick: MIN
CAR @ ARI - I don't know what happened to CAR this year. They are just terrible. ARI isn't really living up to their potential. They're doing alright, but they should be much better. Picklez Pick: ARI
ATL @ NO - The Monday night game is a doozy! NO will win, but it will be one hell of a ride. Picklez Pick: NO
Mike Ditka - "THE ONLY THING PREVENT DEFENSE DOES IS PREVENT YOU FROM WINNING."
Because I spent last weekend at a clinic! Yes, this is the highly anticipated report for the weekend 10-23-09 until 10-25-09.
Celebratory Dinner
Friday marked Mr. and Mrs. Man's 26th wedding anniversary. A big congratulations to them. I couldn't even make it one quarter the way there in my marriage. They've been married over a quarter of a century. That's quite an accomplishment. In addition to not killing each other, they have both raised two fine sons. One day I hope to have a relationship as solid as theirs.
The dinner guests included the Medic, PFC, Big Red, Rita, The Masher, The Rooster, Mr. A and Mrs. A (from Talladega) and myself. I had a ribeye steak. It was delicious.
Disagreement
As the evening wore on, I had discussions with the Masher about proper bowing in procedures and he said that he is breaking from tradition. In case you don't know, traditionally, the highest ranking belt bows in the class. He begins by bowing to Kaicho, then the next ranking belt bows into the lead person, and then so on down to the 1st and 2nd degrees. Here's how it works at a function:
Master Toy (8th deg.) - Kaicho, ni rei!
Master C (7th deg.) - Hu-kaicho T, ni rei!
Highest ranking Shihan - Hu-kaicho C, ni rei!
Highest ranking Shihan-dai (4th deg.) - [To all Shihan regardless of rank (generally 4th and above)] Shihan, ni rei!
Highest ranking Senpai (3rd deg.) - Shihan-dai, ni rei!
Highest ranking Yudansha (2nd deg. or below) - Senpai, ni rei!
Highest ranking kyu grade (1st kyu or below) - Yudansha, ni rei!
Here's how I do it in my class:
Picklez (chief instructor/4th degree) - Kaicho, ni rei!
Picklez - Hu-kaicho T; Hu-kaicho C, ni rei!
See above
Now if I have a guest instructor who is of higher rank, I allow them to bow in the class and I take my normal place as per a function. I don't bow the class in per se. The Masher proposes this if he were to come to my class:
Picklez - Kaicho, ni rei!
Picklez - Hu-kaicho T; Hu-kaicho C, ni rei!
Masher - Sensei Picklez, ni rei!
Next ranking belt - Shihan Masher, ni rei!
Et. al.
I completely understand his philosophy. He feels that if he is a guest in someone's normal class, he should not take precedence over the instructor. I disagree with that because we should follow normal traditional protocols. The Masher was adamant that the instructor should be given the utmost respect; therefore, if he is a guest he should bow into the instructor. At clinics and functions; however, we should follow normal protocols.
My arguement was that if he is a guest at someone's school, shouldn't he respect how the instructor wants to bow in? Furthermore, what constitutes a "clinic"? Does this mean it is a multi-dojo function? What if he and a black belt from another class happen to visit my class on the same night. Does this mean it is now a clinic? That would be unfair to the off night students because they weren't invited. I know we're dealing in semantics here, but the real issue here is tradition. Bowing in is bowing in and if we start deviating from our traditions then only chaos will ensue.
Scolding
This lead to a brief discussion on how respect works. As part of my arguement for tradition, I explained that when I'm bowing in, sometimes I am merely respecting the rank and not the person holding the rank. Jerkwad, FuckFace, and Queen Bee all outrank me, but I don't have a shred of respect for them. I respect their rank and what they had to "do" to "earn" it, but I don't respect them as people because they don't respect me.
The Masher got upset and told me that I should respect them. My response was that I won't ever respect them until they do something worthy of my respect. After all, they are not examples that should be followed. If I followed their examples, I would walk around like an arrogant prick, have poor technique, not teach a successful class, not help with necessary yet menial tasks, show up late, and be disrespectful to everyone I deem unworthy. By the way, I don't respect these people, but I don't go out of my way to disrespect them. I smile and bow and swallow all their bullshit and suffer all their abuse.
The clinic
Overall, I think things went pretty well. It was fun to have the Masher lead the clinic and I just did katas. I felt like I was back in the old J'ville dojo hammering out my forms.
Bury my ears at Squeaky Shoe
There was a battle raging throughout the entire clinic. The Diva had brought her granddaughter and the baby was clad in noise making footwear. In the sole of each shoe there was a soul sucking device that emitted a loud "squeak" everytime the wearer took a step. At first it was a curiosity (squeaksqueaksqueaksqueaksqueak) as you tried to determine the source of the noise. Once you figured out what was happening (squeaksqueaksqueaksqueaksqueaksqueaksqueaksqueak), it became a slight annoyance. As (squeaksqueaksqueaksqueak) time wore on (squeaksqueaksqueaksqueaksqueaksqueaksqueaksqueak), you found that (squeaksqueaksqueaksqueaksqueaksqueaksqueaksqueaksqueak) you were having trouble concentrating on the task (squeaksqueaksqueaksqueaksqueaksqueaksqueaksqueaksqueaksqueaksqueaksqueaksqueak) at hand. Until SQUEAKSQUEAKSQUEAKSQUEAKSQUEAKSQUEAKSQUEAKSQUEAK you began to question your very SQUEAKSQUEAKSQUEAKSQUEAKSQUEAKSQUEAKSQUEAKSQUEAKSQUEAKSQUEAKSQUEAKSQUEAKSQUEAKSQUEAKSQUEAK sanity!SQUEAKSQUEAKSQUEAKSQUEAKSQUEAKSQUEAKSQUEAKSQUEAKSQUEAKSQUEAKSQUEAK!SQUEAKSQUEAKSQUEAKSQUEAKSQUEAKSQUEAKSQUEAKSQUEAKSQUEAKSQUEAKSQUEAKSQUEAK
SQUEAKSQUEAKSQUEAKSQUEAKSQUEAKSQUEAKSQUEAKSQUEAKSQUEAKSQUEAKSQUEAKSQUEAK!
SQUEAKSQUEAKSQUEAKSQUEAK! SQUEAKSQUEAKSQUEAKSQUEAKSQUEAKSQUEAKSQUEAKSQUEAK!
SQUEAKSQUEAK! (sweet silence for about 5 seconds)
SQUEAKSQUEAKSQUEAKSQUEAKSQUEAKSQUEAKSQUEAKSQUEAKSQUEAKSQUEAKSQUEAKSQUEAKSQUEAK!
Arrrrgggghhhhhh!!!!!!!
The only humor I could get out of the situation was by looking at other people's reactions. I turned to PFC and he squinched up his face in pain at the sound. The Medic looked calmer and said, "Wait until Big Red gets here!"
When Big Red finally arrived I watched him when he heard the first few squeaks. He had a puzzled expression on his face as he peered in my direction. I simply shrugged my shoulders as if I didn't know what was happening. A few seconds later the squeaky shoe clad child toddled past him. He glanced at me again and his eyes glared in consternation. His fists clenched tightly and he shook his head angrily. Inside, I was bursting with peals of laughter.
Popping and locking
I was asked to give my "Breaking Omnibus" to the group because we would be breaking boards that day. I delivered the lesson as efficiently and as eloquently as I could. At the end of the clinic, Sensei Tor made all the under 50 black belts do an improv speed break. Basically, 4 other black belts held up boards and you had to quickly shatter them without any preparation.
When my turn arrived, I asked, "This is a simulation of 4 attackers, right? So I should just do what I would normally do in that situation?" Mr. Tor answered in the affirmative. When the command was given and the boards were raised, I ran out of the gym. Everyone had a good laugh, but I was told that I had to actually break the boards. I didn't do too well. I know I did the two finger hold punch and the Shoryuken (rising dragon punch). It was awesome and amusing... to me anyway.
Back at the ranch
I'd be lying if I said I didn't get drunk. I know I had some Jaegerbombs (Jaegermeister and Red Bull - not the blood of the famed test pilot and congressman Chuck Yeager as I had hoped). I also consumed several beers, a few Carbombs, and a shot of Crown Especial.
Drunk Talk
I have a new social dynamic formula: Alcohol + Big Red + Masher = Huge Debate over Y* Karate. Before I begin, I want to say that Big Red is the most passionate person I know when it comes to the future of our style. He wears his emotions on his sleeve and I applaud his courage.
These talks between Big Red and the Masher always result in the same questions. 1) Why does the organization continue to promote people who seemingly do little to contribute to the growth of the style? 2) Why does the organization fail to recognize or reward exemplary behavior? I've noticed that the Masher's message is always the same: Why does Big Red allow himself to get upset over these issues?
Both of them really want the same thing. They want to see Y* succeed. The difference between them is that the Masher accepts his role in the structure (even though it is failing) while Big Red (and myself) seek to change the structure to make it more efficient and better equipped to perpetuate for the years to come.
It's a generational thing. He is reaping the benefits of his long career. He is given respect, rank, and title in the here an now. Unfortunately, for those of us in the younger age bracket, we see the current structure and we realize that we will never be able to obtain these things for ourselves. Not because of a poor work ethic, but because our current structure doesn't promote growth.
It's a lot like the state of Social Security in our country. There are people drawing SS right now. Those folks aren't the ones currently contributing capital to the system. They are merely reaping the benefits and many of them paid in the past so they are just cashing in and rightly so. Our current generation is pouring money into the system as well, but we are being told that there won't be anything for us when we are eligible to participate in the program. So you end up having apathy on the side of the older generation and despair on the side of the younger generation.
Simply put, the Masher doesn't care about improving the current structure in hopes of providing for the future because he is getting the benefits now. His standard response to us is to not worry about such things. Again, what he doesn't see is that in the future there won't be a GM to promote us to the rank he will be receiving. Our careers are pretty much ended before they started.
One of the things that made me uncomfortable was that Big Red was using me as an example of the failing system. I couldn't support his arguments without looking like an egotistical prick so I had to keep quiet. Well, since this is my blog, I'm going to say something here.
Big Red feels that I should have been promoted to Shihan to prove a point that hard work will be rewarded. There are current Shihans that are not contributing as much as they should who did not get their Shihan "on time". We both feel that this could have sent a message to those Shihans that they are screw ups.
What I've come to realize, however, is that those particular Shihans wouldn't ever get the message. All they would see is that someone got something before they were supposed to instead of understanding that the person got rewarded because they worked hard. They will only see the end result rather the motivations behind it. They're just dumb asses.
Another realization that I've made is that the Masher is pretty much just yanking Big Red's chain all the time. He knows things are screwed up, but he is still benefiting so why upset the apple cart. Furthermore, he is having a really fun time debating with Big Red and watching his reactions.
One of the things that bothered me about the discussion was the Masher's flippant attitude toward me and my career in Y*. Basically, he sort of said that I don't deserve a promotion and that I'm really not anything special. A few years ago, I would have shrugged that off and would probably agreed with him. But that was before I started taking grief from a bunch of idiots. I do enjoy working hard for the organization but it only takes one dumb ass to make me want to quit all together.
C. Man funnies
As the night wore on, Big Red got drunker and drunker. Eventually, he said that we bow too much. C's response was, "Yeah, I know what you mean. That's part of the reason I don't like going to church. They have all that praying!" We all laughed and he went on to explain that they do a prayer at the beginning, do a prayer after a scripture reading, do a prayer after a hymn, do a prayer after the sermon, and do a prayer before dismissal. Why not just do one prayer to cover all those things?
The other funny occurred when Big Red went to wake up Rita. He was sloppy drunk so he was pretty much hollering in her ear. She finally stood up and she was a little pissed off. Big Red suggested that she take her frustrations out by kicking C in the nuts. C said very calmly, "Rita, you need to think about that before you do it."
I also learned that C is going to be a "douchebag" for Halloween. He's grown a soul patch and is going to spike his hair and wear a pink polo shirt with the collar popped. He called Big Red and asked to borrow his plaid shorts to complete the outfit. Funny!
.22 Rifle Sniper Challenge
We spent Sunday afternoon washing the various Ranch vehicles. The Medic came over to rotate his tires and before I left, he, PFC, and I shot some targets. We used various shooting positions and even had timed events. It was a lot of fun. The Medic turned out to be the best marksman. PFC was a close second and I brought up the rear. I used to be really good with a .22 in my college days. Today, not so much. I do think that they need to adjust the sites on the bolt action .22 we were using.
END OF LINE
Current Standings
Picklez 62 (Tied for 4th place, 3 points behind the leader)
BabySteps 53 (8th place)
LG 59 (6th place)
Hangtime 52 (dead last)
Tiny Tanks 63 (Tied for 2nd)
You know, Hangtime missed an entire week of picks and he's only one point behind Babysteps.
Week Seven Picks
There were 4 upsets last week. Four! What the hell?! That's football I guess. My new philosophy is to pick who is more likely to lose rather than who I think is going to win. If I had done that, I would have picked the WAS/KC game correctly. I've got 3 upsets this week.
GB @ CLE - It's official. Cleveland sucks. I normally wait until the middle of the season to make such spectacular claims, but I think it's safe for me to let everyone know. It's sad, but true. There's always next year... Picklez Pick: GB
SD @ KC - Conventional wisdom sez: "Teams that lose on Monday night typically lose again the next Sunday." Common sense says, "Kansas Shitty sucks!" Now I know they beat WAS, but WAS lost to DET. (I think there is a new league rule stating that no team shall go completely defeated ever again.) Honestly, SD should have won that game Monday night. They lost because their Special Teams gave up 14 points. When I say, "Special" I mean it. I'm talking "short bus" special. Picklez Pick: SD
IND @ STL - The new league rule does not apply to Suck Louis and it certainly shouldn't apply to PeyPey and the Colts. Fresh off the bye week, they have no excuses if they lose to STL (except the new league rule). Picklez Pick: IND
MIN @ PIT - This is a noodle scratcher. PIT has been sort of inconsistent and their defense isn't as explosive without Palomalu. Here are my questions: Will the MIN O-line be able to protect Brett Favre and open up running lanes for Peterson? If no, will Brett be able to weather a storm of sacks from Harrison? Picklez Pick: PIT
NE @ TB - I'm imagining the speech Billicheck gave in the locker room at half-time last week against TEN. "Fear does not exist in this stadium does it? Defeat does not exist in this stadium does it? Pain does not exist in this stadium does it? Mercy is for the weak. We do not train to be merciful. If a man confronts you on the field, then he is the enemy, and the enemy deserves no mercy!" 59-0. Sweet Fancy Moses! So anyway, Tampa Gay is a much crappier team so... Picklez Pick: NE
SF @ HOU - Upset #1. SF has had a week off and hopefully they have recovered mentally from the thrashing that ATL delivered to them. Also, I hope the SF secondary has learned not to showboat while the play is still in progress. Screwston will probably do it's normal thing... Picklez Pick: SF
NYJ @ OAK - INTs! Jets! Jets! Jets! Great Googly Moogly! Five interceptions! Five! And one of them was in OT! Also, I don't know how the Gaiders were able to beat PHI. Anyway, if Dirty Sanchez wants redemption, he better get it here. You can't lose to Suckalo and Suckland back to back and hope to make the playoffs. Picklez Pick: NYJ
BUF @ CAR - I don't have to think too hard for this one. Picklez Pick: CAR
CHI @ CIN - Upset#2. I really think that CHI could have beaten ATL. Pork Cutlet was up to his old tricks again with turnovers in the red zone. It all comes down to this: CIN offense cannot stand up to the CHI defense. Picklez Pick: CHI
ATL @ DAL - Upset #3. I know DAL is coming off their bye week to a home game, but ATL has put a road victory and a home victory under it's belt since then. I'm not sure that Homo can perform under the pressure that the ATL defense can deliver. Picklez Pick: ATL
NO @ MIA - NO is an unstoppable machine right now. MIA will be like a seaborn mammal out of water. Picklez Pick: NO
ARI @ NYG - ARI beat the Suckhawks. No big deal. The Giants lost to NO (a much tougher team than ARI and SEA combined). Picklez Pick: NYG
PHI @ WAS - What a crapfest! No, seriously. It's like a festival honoring Stirquilius, Roman god of Feces! Picklez Pick: PHI
Watching the ATL/CHI game with BabySteps as Jake Cutler throws his first interception. BabySteps: "I KNEW HE'D COUGH IT UP. THAT'S THE JAKE CUTLER I'VE COME TO KNOW AND LOVE!"
I want to get this out there before all the late night shows steal my joke.
Basically, the Governator signed a law stating that is illegal to use cell phones while driving unless you have a hands free device. In other words, no holding the phone while driving. The California First Lady was photographed doing just that recently. Arnold said on Twitter: "Thanks for brining her violations to my attention. There's going to be swift action."
Here's the conversation:
Arnold: Maria, you need to stop holding your cell phone while you're driving.
Maria: I'm not doing that. It's just a rumor.
Arnold: [produces photographs] It's not a RUMOR!
Hahahahahahahaha! I'm good enough to write for Leno.
THAT IS ALL
